Wednesday 22 December 2010

Winter Discontent

'A dynamic woe blows in with the cold and brings back the loneliness again.'

The winter arrived and something inside me had known that history was to repeat itself. As usual I sought comfort and shelter in the confinement of my habitat. A place that could be also be decribed as a brisk dwelling. I have grown accustomed to the circular patterns of my life and the choices that have been made. Unfortunately, I began to lose my grip on reality and desperately clung to the remaining moments of each dream as if it were my last seconds of life. Desperate, disillusioned and disappointed each time I awoke from a long, peaceful sleep. My sense of pride stood boldly blocking any decision to seek direction. My sense of apprehension seemed to gradually implode, leaving behind an embodiment without soul, emotion nor progressive thought.

Abandoned in a world I don't belong in or recognise. Can anybody out there save me from this dire discontentment?

Sunday 21 November 2010

My ode to you

Enchanted by her aura
Enticed by her beauty
Encouraged from her optimism
Endorsed by her kindness

Enlisted by the forces of nature
Enslaved by it's grip
Enlightened upon reflection
Engulfed by my sorrow

Endangered by your loss
Entrenched by my obscurity

Enlosed is my ode to you....


[kb2010]

Forever sheltered, Forever Lost

Once again I have found myself in a place where I am comfortable.
A place where I am at peace.
Harm will not me find me here and hurt exists only in my imagination.
I take what I have.
Warmth from my solace strengthens whatever of the soul remains.
For I am alone in these moments and let it be so.
Let the memory of yesterday absolve itself in thoughts that are new.
I dream of grandeur, deluded in my own self-belief.
No longer haunted by my mischief and misadventure.
My journey to contentment is in slow approach like the last train.
And so I ride through the tunnel with glimmers of daylight warming my iris.

Changes

It's November 2010. I'm a week shy of my 26th birthday. My gosh time flies by so quickly. 10 years ago i was in my last year of high school. 3 years ago I was entering higher education at the age of 22. And in 4 years time I will be 30. Where has time gone? More importantly what can I say I have achieved, accomplished or even experienced from all those years that has passed me? A question I constantly seek the answers for. Am I just sailing slowly with the after-winds? Am I truly embracing society and the changes that come with this generation.

I often feel that I belong in a different moment in time, like the 70s, 80s or even 90s. I'm struggling to fit in the 21st century in many ways. The fashion is constantly changing and is not to my interests. The digital age is in full effect and I guess aspire to belong in that world considering i'm undertaking a Digital Film & Screen Arts degree. The way we view the world has changed. Technology is at it's most advanced stage than it has ever been for a very long time. From High Definition digital equipment to Internet-ready mobile phones to watching films in the cinema in 3D. Has society developed into a mass consumer culture? Has the global recession influenced this change or has this culture always been in existence?

What I have found most interesting is that popular mainstream music has also evolved. We are now hearing more music developing house, tecnho or drum and bass to it's core melody. Many artists across various genre's have associated themselves with this new age style of music. I also feel vocal engineering or enhancement plays a major role in the success of much music we hear today. Some call this style the 'Auto-Tune' effect most commonly made popular with artists such as T-Pain, Kanye West and more recently Will.i.am from the Black-Eyed Peas. What many of the younger generation of today do not know is that this style of vocal manipulation has been around years before. My fear is that genuinely talented musicians and artists will fade away and not be fully embraced and appreciated my the masses who enjoy hearing music for it's value and not it's image and commercial status.

In a world where image and status takes prevalence, I ask myself where would I fit in. How long will I continue to stand in the background observing society with cynicsm and disbelief? How many more steps backwards must I keep taking before I fall over the edge? Most of all, I wonder when will the time come when I make my mark in the world with determination to succeed and prove to myself that the 'potential' label I have carried with me for many years can now be removed and be replaced with 'talented', 'gifted' or even 'distinguished'? I feel the time is near where I can now lay to the rest the uncertainties, the insecurities and the scepticsm that have so far prolonged my pessimistic view of the world.

A wise man once said, "Our attitude towards life determines life's attitude towards us." [Earl Nightingale]

Thank you for reading.

Wednesday 3 February 2010

I'm back for 2010

Hello my fellow bloggers and I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year!
It's been a while since my last post but i'm back with fresh new ideas and thoughts. So I look forward to you guys reading my stuff and sharing your comments. I hope you enjoy what I got in store for you guys over the next few weeks.