The Declaration

I’ll leave it all behind if you can assure me that now everything will surely be alright again. Whisper in my ear that I’m all you need. Lead this blind fool into the twilight of your starry universe. Touch me with the warmth of your heart and the strength of your soul. Let me hold you in my arms. Let the purity of new beginnings indulge my inner child. Let the excitement of imagination satisfy my need to have you near to me. These sad eyes hidden behind this smile is all I have. An open mind and empty heart now resides where I stand. These eyes have shed the sorrows of yesteryear. You are the hope of a vibrant journey ahead and your eyes will unlock the darkness within my soul. You are my dream. You are my angel. Let us break bread together. Let us make love. Let us pray that our lives will be bountiful and joyous. I will shelter you from the rain and protect you from the storm. I will unlock my aged fortress if you open the gates of your garden.
I will you love eternally if you can unravel the good that lies within me. Let me cultivate the splendour within you.

You can be my Queen if you only let me be your King.

Defiant Obstacles

My muddied waters that lie in my wake were the foundations of a future
Insecurities laid bare
My mind filled with fears
Yet still I stand with hope.

My sleepless nights spawn listless morning
No lessons learned no future
Life will always plunge me down
Yet still I'll manage to cope.

Interlude

Yesterday when we were getting high
I didn't mind it but I didn't like it

Anyway, what we decided to try
I couldn't fight it. It was just pure excitement

You can say what you wanna say now
You can go where you wanna go

Cos your dreams will all unfold
If they don't you're forever blinded

Living in Limbo

I’m in the strangest place that I have ever been. Half of me resides here on Earth. The other in an unknown place that is indescribable to the human mind. When I dream I’m awake in this alternate place walking care-free with familiar faces from my past, present and future. My mind transports itself constantly through different time-spaces evoking various scenarios and emotions over its course. How do you explain to somebody that you have a time-travelling mind? The only way to describe it to somebody is by asking them to imagine a person flicking through television channels every few minutes. When I wake up from sleeping, I often feel disorientated. My mind wonders what day, time or even year it is.

Occasionally wonder if I’m actually alive or if I’m just a memory in the minds of people who once knew me. Or maybe I’m dead or a person that died and has been reincarnated in another person’s body. Maybe that's why I am a forgotten soul. Maybe that’s why I am a lost soul. Maybe that’s why people don’t notice me or engage in eye-contact. Whatever the situation is I know I need to look into it further. Problem is where do I start?

What I do know is that I’m cursed with misfortune and calamity. I truly believe that there are people out there who were just born cursed, I being one of them. Over the years, you just get used to it. ‘Never hold high expectations of any kind as they will always be disrupted with misfortune’. I would regard this as rule number one from my experiences. When people don’t have faith in you let alone you having faith in yourself then you’re always destined for failure.

Where am I? And when, if ever, will I be at peace once again? I long for somebody to find me and keep me settled in their world.

Dear World

Dear World,

I’m no longer at mad you for how my life has turned out. I have learned to understand the social dynamics of my environment. It has taken me time to realise this but I can safely say that my grievances lie elsewhere. I am no longer at war with you. I surrendered this futile attempt of my angst some time ago.

Now all I ask is that you can try and relocate me back in society. Transport me to my future and forge me a connection with time and space. I no longer wish to be a bystander peering through my looking-glass.

The Last Of The Mr Nice Guys

Being nice doesn’t get you anywhere. It doesn’t get the girl. It doesn’t get you that promotion you’ve been secretly hoping for at work. It doesn’t even get you the respect or recognition from your friends or family. I know they say it’s a dog-eat dog world but is there no place in the world for the kind-hearted, chivalrous gentlemen any longer?

It sometimes puzzles me how people can be ruthless, care-free and inconsiderate to others. At what point do you stop and think to yourself, ‘Why am I doing this?’ or, ‘What’s the point?’ People can exploit kindness as weakness. The definition of nice within the description of one’s character or personality does not possess the warm, radiant positive connotations as it may have done in the past. Instead, nice derives the notion of mediocrity and the idea of being average.

My message to guys out there: Don’t be nice anymore. Be wary but be yourself. Be charismatically charming but most importantly be distinctly interesting.

Thanks for reading.

Save Me!

I stopped panicking, even though my breathing became difficult and my vision was unclear. I had one option in my mind. Survive. Something gave me the strength to surface. All I remember was the sounds of what I can only describe as people trying to revive my conscious mind. The voices had awaken me once again. The spirit within made contact. Present day caught up with my alternative escape.

Forever misunderstood and sadly forever forgotten about. The days of unity have divided what we once notioned as family. The seeds have long been sewn and the fruits of the tree of life are ripe into maturity. The next generation are still being readied to carry on the cycle. There are the only hope to repair the ageing tree. They have to be allowed to make changes for they will carry the torch of unity that will one day become a legacy!

Under Constuction

The transition into adult can often become difficult. With age comes great responsiblity. Sometimes we have to sacrifice all the of the things we have learned and experienced and start over again. We must be patient. We must survive.

Sometimes we have to break the cycle of dysfunctionality within family. The pain from yesterday must be absoloved through forgiveness,
the same forgiveness which will over time heal the blackness which resides deep in our souls and memories.Time is a precious thing.

Hidden emotions have a tendancy to manifest over time.

D.S.T (Deliver Some Truth)

Life has a funny way of kicking you when you are down. Nonetheless, the season of Spring has arrived, much to my relief and many others I am sure. The winter was tough for me, I didn't enjoy it in the slightest and once again it proved to cause me difficulties within my life. It's like they say (whoever 'they' is), "From the darkness comes the light", or something to that effect. Anyway with much warmer and brighter days to come, I hope that new ventures will follow.

I have often been excited viewing Spring as the big build-up to the summer (wherever that may be for me this year). It's a time for planning, a time to contemplate on personal goals and work towards achieving them, not that Spring is the only time to have these forethoughts. One of my goals is to negotiate new friendships and relationships and maintain a balance of who I am and what life direction I intend to embark on. I have strong ambitions to do some travelling around Europe and absorb new languages, cultures and social interactions. This year is my year of discovery and I hope I can find fortune and happiness on the way.

Thanks for reading.

The Empty Voids

I fought a thousand times before
I fought for you and for me
I fight and fight and fight some more
Until eventually I am fighting with me

I cry a thousand times inside
I cry for you and for me
And when I cry, I run and hide
I run and cry easily

I die a thousand times inside
I die for you and for me
And when I die, I will die with pride
I will die until my soul will be free

[kb2011]