I’m in the strangest place that I have ever been. Half of me resides here on Earth. The other in an unknown place that is indescribable to the human mind. When I dream I’m awake in this alternate place walking care-free with familiar faces from my past, present and future. My mind transports itself constantly through different time-spaces evoking various scenarios and emotions over its course. How do you explain to somebody that you have a time-travelling mind? The only way to describe it to somebody is by asking them to imagine a person flicking through television channels every few minutes. When I wake up from sleeping, I often feel disorientated. My mind wonders what day, time or even year it is.
Occasionally wonder if I’m actually alive or if I’m just a memory in the minds of people who once knew me. Or maybe I’m dead or a person that died and has been reincarnated in another person’s body. Maybe that's why I am a forgotten soul. Maybe that’s why I am a lost soul. Maybe that’s why people don’t notice me or engage in eye-contact. Whatever the situation is I know I need to look into it further. Problem is where do I start?
What I do know is that I’m cursed with misfortune and calamity. I truly believe that there are people out there who were just born cursed, I being one of them. Over the years, you just get used to it. ‘Never hold high expectations of any kind as they will always be disrupted with misfortune’. I would regard this as rule number one from my experiences. When people don’t have faith in you let alone you having faith in yourself then you’re always destined for failure.
Where am I? And when, if ever, will I be at peace once again? I long for somebody to find me and keep me settled in their world.
